Really Funny Jokes
>> Friday, June 3, 2011
Really Funny Jokes |
| Posted: 03 Jun 2011 12:01 AM PDT
TRAFFIC LIGHT -- apparatus that automatically turns red when your car approaches. DIVORCE -- postgraduate in School of Love. PIONEER -- early American who was lucky enough to find his way out of the woods. PEOPLE -- some make things happen, some watch things happen, and the majority has no idea what's happened. SWIMMING POOL -- a mob of people with water in it. SELF-CONTROL -- the ability to eat only one peanut. SALESMAN -- man with ability to convince wife she'd look fat in mink. CANNIBAL -- person who likes to see other people stewed. EGOCENTRIC -- a person who believes he is everything you know you are. FOREIGN FILM -- any movie shown in Texas theater that isn't a western. OPTIMIST -- girl who regards a bulge as a curve. MAGAZINE -- bunch of printed pages that tell you what's coming in the next issue. COLLEGE -- The four-year period when parents are permitted access to the telephone. EMERGENCY NUMBERS -- Police station, fire department and places that deliver. OPERA -- When a guy gets stabbed in the back and instead of bleeding he sings. BUFFET -- A French word that means "Get up and get it yourself." BABY-SITTER -- A teen-ager who must behave like an adult so that the adults who are out can behave like teen-agers. TATTOO -- Permanent proof of temporary insanity.   |
| Posted: 03 Jun 2011 12:01 AM PDT
Two Muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Holy Sh*t it's hot in here!" The other muffin says, "Holy Sh*t... A talking muffin!"   |
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