Really Funny Jokes

Posted: 19 Jan 2010 12:02 AM PST

A father, son and grandfather went to the country club for their weekly round of golf. Just as they reached the first tee, a beautiful young blonde woman carrying her bag of clubs approached them.

She explained that the member who brought her to the club for a round of golf had an emergency that called him away, and asked the trio if she could join them. Naturally, the guys all agreed.

Smiling, the blonde thanked them and said, "Look, fellows, I'm a dancer in a topless bar so nothing shocks me anymore. If any of you want to smoke cigars, drink beer, bet, swear, tell off-color stories or do whatever it is you normally do when playing golf together, feel free to do so. But I want you to know I take my golf game seriously and consider myself to be pretty good at it, so don't try to coach me on how to play my shots." With that, the guys agreed to relax and invited her to tee-off first.

All eyes were fastened on her shapely behind as she bent over to place her ball on the tee. She then took her driver and hit the ball 270 yards down the middle, right in front of the green.

The father's mouth was agape. "That was beautiful," he said.

The blonde put her driver away and said, "I really didn't get into it and I faded it just a little."

After the three guys hit their drives and their second shots, the blonde took out an eight iron and lofted the ball within five feet of the pin.

The son said, "Damn, lady, you played that perfectly."

The blonde frowned and said, "It was a little weak, but even a soft seven would have been too much club. I've left myself a tricky little putt." She then tapped in the five-footer for a birdie.

Having the honors, she hit first on the second hole, knocked the hell out of the ball, and it landed nearly 300 yards away, smack in the middle of the fairway.

For the rest of the round the leggy blonde continued to amaze the guys, quietly shooting par or less on every hole.

When they arrived at the 18th green, the blonde was three under and had a very difficult 12-foot putt on an undulating green for a par. She turned to the three guys and said, "I really want to thank you all for not acting like a bunch of chauvinists and telling me what club to use or how to play a shot, but I need this putt for a 69 and I'd really like to break 70 on this course. If any one of you can tell me how to make par on this hole, I'll take him back to my apartment, ply him with 35-year-old, Single Malt, Strathmill Scotch, fix him a steak dinner, and then show him a very good time the rest of the night."

The yuppie son jumped at the thought! He strolled across the green,carefully eyeing the line of the putt, and finally said, "Honey, aim about 6 inches to the right of the hole and hit it firm. It will get over that little hump and break right into the cup."

The father knelt down and sighted the putt using his putter as a plumb."Don't listen to the kid. You want to hit it softly 10 inches to the right and let it run left down that little hogback so it drops in the cup."

The old gray-haired grandfather walked over to the blonde's ball, picked it up, handed it to her and said, "That's a gimme, sweetheart."

The blonde smiled and said, "Your car or mine?"

OLD AGE AND WISDOM WILL OVERCOME SKILL EVERY TIME!

Best funny jokes-Tailored trousers

Posted: 19 Jan 2010 12:01 AM PST

The customer was dissatisfied with his pair of tailored trousers and decided to take them back to the tailor. However, the tailor was out and only his wife was there at the shop. The customer was rather embarrassed at explaining the problem to her and said, "This pair of trousers is like the ballroom in Westminster Abbey."

The tailor's wife was surprised and said, "Sir, there is no ballroom in the Abbey."

To which the customer replied, "Well, there is no ballroom in this trouser either."

Current News

Palm Springs Film Festival
MAT 7Feb 2010 exam Admit Cards avialble : Take Print out
Process Control Block(PCB)
Roger Federer Australian Open
Indian Premier League 2010
Deemed Universities In India
Sathyabama University Result
Madurai Kamaraj University BA BSc BCom & PG Results Nov-2009@ www.mkuniversity.org
BITSAT 2010 -BITS Pilani Admissions Application www.bitsadmission.com

Palm Springs Film Festival

Posted: 19 Jan 2010 04:06 AM PST

Mercedes-Benz Audience Award for Best Narrative Feature:

The girl with the dragon tattoo

Audience Award for Best Documentary Feature:

The most dangerous American man :Daniel Ellsbarg
special presentations

The 2010 Palm Springs International Film Festival wrapped up on January 18. Many thanks to all the filmmakers, speakers, volunteers, venues and sponsors who made the Festival such a success.

The Palm Springs International Film Festival, conversely, has been growing slowly but surely, building a strong foundation for its original mission, conceived with the input of the Los Angeles Film Critics Association 23 years ago, to present the world's best foreign language films.

MAT 7Feb 2010 exam Admit Cards avialble : Take Print out

Posted: 19 Jan 2010 02:12 AM PST

All India Management Associaion sent Admit Cards to write the examinatons. Now download the Admit card for MAT2010
For February 7 MAT exam the admit cards, Hall tickets uploaded on site. where you can check and download Admit Cards. I have checked the link here
Go through link provided to you here.
Reciept: http://www.aima-ind.org/matreceipt.asp

http://www.aima-ind.org/matcentre.asp

Admit Cards for the examinaiton of MAT updated, whether you writing onlne exam or offline in Paper mode. Online examination , you can write on computer and submit.
Admit Card provide you your Exam Hall ticket No, Test Date and Time.
k I hope its fine to write

Process Control Block(PCB)

Posted: 18 Jan 2010 10:28 PM PST

A Process Control Block is a data structure in the operating system kernel containing the information needed to manage a particular process. The PCB is the manifestation of a process in an operating system.it is also called Task Controling Block or Task Struct the short form of Process control Block(PCB).

During a context switch, the running process is stopped and another process is given a chance to run. The kernel must stop the execution of the running process, copy out the values in hardware registers to its PCB, and update the hardware registers with the values from the PCB of the new process.

Since the PCB contains the critical cvgkbn,mcvbnvbncvbnvbnvbninformation for the process, it must be kept in an area of memory protected from normal user access. In some operating systems the PCB is placed in the beginning of the kernel stack of the process since that is a convenient protected location.

Roger Federer Australian Open

Posted: 18 Jan 2010 10:09 PM PST

Roger Federer is a Swiss tennis player whose amazing achievements helped rank him along the best tennis professionals of all time. As of January 2007, Roger Federer is the world's number 1 tennis player. Many tennis observers, including even many of his peers, believe that Federer can be the greatest tennis player ever.

Roger Federer was born on August 8, 1981, in Binningen near Basel, Switzerland. His parents are Robert Federer, a Swiss-German and Lynette Federer, of South African nationality. Federer considers German as his main language German, but he is also fluent in the French and English languages. Federer always conducts his press conferences in all these three language. Currently he resides in Oberwil, Switzerland and is seeing former WTA player Miroslava Vavrine, also a Swiss, who retired from tennis upon injuring her foot in 2002. Federer and Vavrine met during the 2000 Sydney Olympics.

The year 2004 was Roger Federer's one of the most successful years in the sport of men's tennis. He was able to win three of the four of the Grand Slam singles tournament. He also won his first Australian Open title when he defeated Marat Safin. Federer was also the ITF Tennis World Champion and adjudged in 2005 as the Laureus World Sportsman of the Year.

Indian Premier League 2010

Posted: 18 Jan 2010 09:58 PM PST

IPL Auction 2010 List

Australia: Brad Haddin, Philip Hughes, Doug Bollinger, Ashley Noffke, Adam Voges, Luke Pomersbach, Clint McKay, Graham Manou, Ben Laughlin, Jason Krejza, Damien Martyn

England: Tim Bresnan, Eoin Morgan, Robert Key, Anthony McGrath, Monty Panesar, Mark Ramprakash, Graeme Swann, Jonathon Trott

Pakistan: Shahid Afridi, Misbah-ul-Haq, Umar Gul, Imran Nazir, Rana Naved-ul-Hasan, Mohammad Aamer, Abdul Razzaq, Kamran Akmal, Umar Akmal, Saeed Ajmal, Sohail Tanvir

South Africa: Zander de Bruyn, Wayne Parnell, Tyron Henderson, Lonwabo Tsotsobe, Rory Kleinveldt, Yusuf Abdulla, Vernon Philander, Johan van der Wath, Vaughn van Jaarsveld, Morne van Vyk, Justin Kemp

Sri Lanka: Nuwan Kulasekara, Nuwan Zoysa, Upul Tharanga, Thissara Perera, Thilina Kandamby, Kaushalya Weeraratne, Chanaka Welegedara, Chinthaka Jayasinghe, Chamara Silva

West Indies: Kieron Pollard, Ramnaresh Sarwan, Daren Ganga, Lendl Simmons, Darren Bravo, Wavell Hinds, Kemar Roach, Sulieman Benn

New Zealand: Grant Elliott, Lou Vincent, Shane Bond, Nathan McCullum

Zimbabwe: Murray Goodwin

Bangladesh: Shakib Al Hasan

Canada: Rizwan Cheema

Netherlands: Ryan ten Doeschate

Deemed Universities In India

Posted: 18 Jan 2010 09:47 PM PST

Deemed university is a status of autonomy granted to high performing institutes and departments of various universities in India.Union Human Resource Development Ministry, on the advice of the University Grants Commission (UGC) of India, under Section 3 of the University Grants Commission (UGC) Act, 1956.

University Grant Commission (U G C)
Bahadur Shah Zafar Marg, New Delhi
Pin:110 002
India

More Information Available On Deemed University Click Here

Sathyabama University Result

Posted: 18 Jan 2010 09:36 PM PST

Sathyabama University is a private university at Chennai in Tamil Nadu, India, founded in 1988 as Sathyabama Engineering College by Jeppiaar Educational Trust formed in 1987 and inaugurated by then Chief Minister of Tamil Nadu, Janaki Ramachandran. It was formerly known as Sathyabama Institute of Science and Technology (SIST). The university is headed by Dr. Jeppiaar, a former politician under the late M. G. Ramachandran.

The institution is reputed for its student placements, discipline and good facilities. The varsity is a Christian minority institutionThe university is located in the suburb of Sholinganallur about 15 kilometres from Adyar in Chennai. The university is situated next to the Rajiv Gandhi Salai known as Old Mahabalipuram Road and also popularly known as IT Corridor the university is also accessible by the East Coast Road.

Sathyabama University Results 2009 check here

Madurai Kamaraj University BA BSc BCom & PG Results Nov-2009@ www.mkuniversity.org

Posted: 18 Jan 2010 09:42 AM PST

Madhurai University will be announced the Exam results 2010 which were held in November 2009. Madhurai University results working Links.

Madhurai Semster Results Updates: Madhurai University will relased all UG and PG annual / Semester exam results which were conducted in Nov-09.

When we expect the BU Under graduate BA BSc BCom MPC MPCs courses results of NOv 2009?
MKU already announced results, so you just go through the official link or one more link given below. check out their powerful results at the links given.

Where can you find MKU updated results?

Dear Students you can find results at MKU, ie. you can see the reuslts on the following web-Link The Address of Official results site of MKU: http://www.mkuniversity.org/results_new.php

Hello if official site down: No worry use the other link Kalvimalar:

Link to see / check/ print Results : http://www.kalvimalar.com/mkuDecPg.asp

ie. Kalvimalar: Tamil Nadu results Portal. Go to through link. You will find the results online.

I Wish you Best of luck

BITSAT 2010 -BITS Pilani Admissions Application www.bitsadmission.com

Posted: 18 Jan 2010 01:43 AM PST

Bits-pilani.ac.in Admission form BITSAT 2010

BITS Pilani Admissions:
Students you can download the Application form for BITSAT 2010. Students can ve apply for Admission in BITS,

BITS Pilani - The Birla Institute of Technology & Science (BITS) given Notification for Admission Test BITSAT- 2010. BITSAT is an admission Test to Join in BITS.

DEAD LINES to Apply: You have to send the applicaton to Admission Office, BITS before Dead Lines. Candidates can download the application. There is another Best option to apply. Through Online you can apply.
How to Apply Online , Submit application?
You should register your Name, BITSAT-2010 byf filling up your Details, and submit online and take print out your Documents which you filled online.
http://www.bitsadmission.com

Instructions to Apply BITSAT 2010:

Fee Details:
Aplication Amount for BITSAT: 1000/- (Discount for Female candidates, it is Rs. 500/- only to encourage for higher studies). You can pay Application Fees in any one of the following Ways.

1. Payment by Credit Cards (All credit cards issued by Master and Visa)
2. Payment through Net Banking
3. By cash payment at all ICICI Bank branches through a challan which is to be printed from this websitewhile registering.

When Will Exams wil conduct? What are the BITSAT 2010 Exam Dates for 2010?
You can writed the examinations through Online in between Dates: BITSAT Examinations will conduct online From 10th May - 10th June 2010.

Further more information regarding BITS Entrance Exam BITSAT.. You can visit the Admissions official site Called www.bitsadmission.com

Best Wishes from
Results-2010