Really Funny Jokes

Really funny jokes-SWAT team
Kids jokes-Voting
Clean jokes-A Mother's Dictionary

Posted: 25 Dec 2009 12:05 AM PST

The murderer was holed up in his house, and the SWAT team was trying to get him out.
A cop got on the bullhorn and said, "Come on out, or I'm going to come in there and drag you out!"
The murderer called back, "I'm warning you. If you don't wipe your feet when you come in, my wife'll kill us both!"

Kids jokes-Voting

Posted: 25 Dec 2009 12:04 AM PST

Marty took her pre-school son with her when she voted. The polling site was in an elementary school cafeteria that was decorated with paper turkeys in anticipation of Thanksgiving.
As Marty went into the voting booth her little boy asked -- you guessed it -- "Which turkey are you voting for?"

Clean jokes-A Mother's Dictionary

Posted: 25 Dec 2009 12:03 AM PST

A - ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

B - BATHROOM: A room used by the entire family, believed by all except Mom to be self-cleaning.

C - COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

D - DATE: Infrequent outings with Dad where Mom can enjoy worrying about the kids in a different setting.

E - EMPTY NEST: See "WISHFUL THINKING."

F - FABLE: A story told by a teenager arriving home after curfew.

G - GUM: Adhesive for the hair.

H - HINDSIGHT: What Mom experiences from changing too many diapers.

I - INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

J - JUNK: Dad's stuff.

K - KISS: Mom's medicine.

L - LEMONADE STAND: Complicated business venture where Mom buys powdered mix, sugar, lemons, and paper cups, and sets up a table, chairs, pitchers and ice for kids who sit there for three to six minutes and next a profit of 15 cents.

M - MAYBE: No.

N - NAIL POLISH: part of an assortment of make-up items such as lipstick, eyeliner, blush etc. which ironically make Mom look better while making her young daughter look "like a tramp."

O - OVERSTUFFED RECLINER: Mom's nickname for Dad.

P - PANIC: What a mother goes through when the darn wind-up swing stops.

Q - QUIET: A state of household serenity which occurs before the birth of the first child and occurs again after the last child has left for college.

R - REFRIGERATOR: Combination art gallery and air-conditioner for the kitchen.

S - SPOILED ROTTEN: What the kids become after as little as 15 minutes with Grandma.

T - TOWELS: See "FLOOR COVERINGS".

U - UNDERWEAR: An article of clothing, the cleanliness of which ensures the wearer will never have an accident.

V - VACATION: Where you take the family to get away from it all, only to find it there, too.

W - WALLS: Complete set of drawing paper for kids that comes with every room.

X - XOXOXOXOXO: Mom salutation guaranteed to make the already embarrassing note in a kid's lunch box even more mortifying.

Y - "YIPPEE!": What mother's shout the first day of school.

Z - ZUCCHINI: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it.

Current News

christmas sms messages merry christmas sms messages

Posted: 24 Dec 2009 11:53 PM PST

merry christmas wishes, merry christmas sms, merry christmas message, merry christmas, merry christmas greetings sms

May the good times and treasures of the present become the golden memories of tomorrow.Wish you lots of love, joy and happiness. MARRY CHRISTMAS

If one night a big fat man jumps in at your window grabs you and puts you in a sack don't worry I told Santa I wanted you for CHRISTMAS

Christmas may be many things
or it may be a few.
For you, the joy
is each new toy;
for me;
it's watching U MARRY CHRISTMAS

A Christmas candle is a lovely thing; It makes no noise at all, But softly gives itself away While quite unselfish, it grows small.

If one night you wake up and a big fat male is trying to put you in a sack please don't be afraid because i told santa all i want for
christmas is you

Pope Benedict XVI blesses the faithful during Christmas Mass in St. Peter's Basilica at the Vatican, Thursday, Dec. 24, 2009. A Vatican spokesman said a woman jumped barriers and knocked down the pontiff as he was arriving for the mass but the 82-year-old pope quickly got up and was unhurt,

A Palestin

ian boy looks at a Baby Jesus inside the Church of Nativity, traditionally believed by Christians to be the birthplace of Jesus Christ, in the West Bank town of Bethlehem,

People celebrate Christmas Eve in front of Moscow's Catholic Church of the Immaculate Conception, Russia,

Men in Santa Claus costumes walk past a Muslim woman during a Christmas celebration at Kelapa Gading shopping mall in Jakarta, Indonesia,

kj somaiya college of engineering

Posted: 23 Dec 2009 09:03 AM PST

Interaction is the key to development of an institution. Having close to 600 students being admitted every year and each faculty member available for guidance for about 20 students on a personal basis, we try to optimize the quality of education imparted. To cater to such a humongous need, we also have a sprawling campus over 60 acres, in Vidyavihar, in the heart of Mumbai.

KJSCE offers Bachelor of Engineering course in Mechanical Engineering, Electronics Engineering, Electronics and Telecommunication Engineering, Computer Engineering and Information Technology.

This campus also houses many institutions with a variety of courses offered, right from Yoga classes to foreign language education. This gives the students a unique opportunity to hone their personality.

Various cultural and academic activities are organized on the campus grounds which motivate the students to perform to the best of their abilities.

K. J. Somaiya College of Engineering
Vidyanagar, Vidyavihar(E), Mumbai - 400 077,
Maharashtra.
Phone 91-22-66449191
Fax : 91-22-25152272
Website : www.somaiya.edu/kjsce
Email : userid@engg.somaiya.edu

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