| Little Johnny jokes-A Horse auction Posted: 29 Dec 2010 12:02 AM PST 
Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs, rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, "Dad, why are you doing that?"
His father replied, "Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy.
Johnny, looking worried, said, "Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom."  |
| Christmas jokes-Puppy Posted: 29 Dec 2010 12:01 AM PST 
Letters to SantaDear Santa, I really really want a puppy this year. Please please please PLEASE PLEASE could I have one? Timmy Timmy, That whiney begging sh*t may work with your folks, but that crap doesn't work with me. You're getting a sweater again. Santa  |
| Computer programmer jokes - Wish Posted: 28 Dec 2010 06:14 AM PST 
A programmer is walking along a road and suddenly finds a lamp. He rubs the lamp, and a genie appears. "I am the most powerful genie in the world. I can grant you any wish, but only one wish." The programmer pulls out a map, points to it and says, "I'd want peace in the Middle East." The genie responds, "See, I don't know. Those people have been fighting for millennium. I can do just about anything, but this is likely beyond my limits." The programmer then says, "Well, I am a programmer, and my programs have lots of users. Please make all my users satisfied with my software and let them ask for sensible changes." At which point the genie responds, "Um, let me see that map again."  |
