Really Funny Jokes

Kids jokes-Left handed
Really funny jokes-Train accident
College jokes-Generosity

Posted: 16 Nov 2009 12:04 AM PST

Little Ricky was spending the weekend with his grandmother after a particularly trying week in kindergarten.
His grandmother decided to take him to the park on Saturday. It had been snowing all night and everything was beautiful. His grandmother remarked, "Doesn't it look like an artist painted this scenery?
Did you know God painted this just for you?"
Ricky said, "Yes, God did it, and he did it left handed."
This confused his grandmother a bit, and she asked him, "What makes you say God did this with his left hand?"
"Well," said Ricky, "we learned at Sunday School last week that Jesus sits on God's right hand!

Really funny jokes-Train accident

Posted: 16 Nov 2009 12:03 AM PST

In a terrible accident at a railroad crossing, a train smashed into a car and pushed it nearly four hundred yards down the track. Though no one was killed, the driver took the train company to court.

At the trial, the engineer insisted that he had given the driver ample warning by waving his lantern back and forth for nearly a minute. He even stood and convincingly demonstrated how he'd done it. The court believed his story, and the suit was dismissed.

"Congratulations, " the lawyer said to the engineer when it was over. "You did superbly under cross examination. "

"Thanks," he said, "but he sure had me worried."

"How's that?" the lawyer asked.

"I was afraid he was going to ask if the darn lantern was lit!"

College jokes-Generosity

Posted: 16 Nov 2009 12:03 AM PST

A couple of college kids, Stan and Ryan, are riding to school on a Chicago subway train when a homeless man approaches and begs for spare change. Stan adamantly rejects the man in disgust while Ryan, on the other hand, pulls out his wallet and gives the man two dollars and wishes him the best.
The homeless man thanks Ryan kindly and then continues on to the other passengers. Stan is outraged by his friend's act of generosity. "What the heck did you do that?" shouts Stan. "You know he's probably only gonna use it for drugs or booze!"
Ryan replies, "And we weren't?"

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