Really Funny Jokes

Posted: 22 Sep 2010 12:02 AM PDT

A man went to the doctor's office to get a double dose of Viagra. The doctor told him that he couldn't allow him a double dose.

"Why not?" asked the man.
"Because it's not safe," replied the doctor.
"But I need it really bad," said the man.
"Well, why do you need it so badly?" asked the doctor.

The man said, "My girlfriend is coming into town on Friday; my ex-wife will be here on Saturday; and my wife is coming home on Sunday. Can't you see? I must have a double dose."

The doctor finally relented saying, "Okay, I'll give it to you, but you have to come in on Monday morning so that I can check you to see if there are any side effects."

On Monday, the man dragged himself in; his arm in a sling. The doctor asked, "What happened to you?"

The man said, "No one showed up."

Kids jokes-Wrong feet

Posted: 22 Sep 2010 12:01 AM PDT

Greg, the three year old, put his shoes on by himself. His father, Barry, noticed that the left shoe was on the right foot and vice-versa. He sat Greg down on a chair and said quietly, 'Greg, your shoes are on the wrong feet.'

He looked up at his father with a quizzical expression and replied, 'Don't mess me about, Dad, I know they're my feet.'

Current News

IOCL Recruitment | Indian Oil Corporation Ltd | IOCL Recruitment At www.iocl.com

Posted: 22 Sep 2010 03:08 AM PDT

Indian Oil Corporation Ltd. IOCL Recruitment 2010 | Engineers/Officers/GAEs Recruitment 2010 | IOCL Online Recruitment Application Forms 2010 | www.iocl.com

IndianOil requires 300 engineers in 2011

Indian Oil Corporation Ltd Official Website : http://www.iocl.com/

Latest job openings

Recruitment of Engineers
Recruitment of Chief Research Manager / DGM in R & D centre
Recruitment of Engineering Assistant/Technical Attendant-I in SRPL

Please Visit Given Below link's to Get,Apply for Job.

official website of Indian Oil Corporation Ltd.

IOCL Engineers/Officers/GAEs Recruitment Notification 2010

Applications are invited for the position of Engineers/ Graduate Apprentice Engineers (GAEs) in the following engineering disciplines:

Chemical Engineering (Including Petrochemicals engineering)
Civil Engineering (excluding Construction/ Transportation engineering)
Electrical Engineering ( including Electrical & Electronics engineering but excluding Electrical & Communication/Telecommunication engineering)
Instrumentation Engineering (Including Electronics & Instrumentation engineering but excluding Electronics &
Communication engineering/ Telecommunication engineering)
Mechanical Engineering (excluding Production/ Manufacturing/ Industrial engineering)
Metallurgical Engineering

The eligibility criteria regarding prescribed educational qualification, age and other eligibility criteria and application procedure is mentioned below:

Educational Qualification

Minimum educational qualification for employment in above mentioned positions are:

Candidates should have passed qualifying degree examinations and awarded bachelor's degree in engineering/ technology in the above mentioned disciplines (full time regular courses only) from recognized Indian Universities / Institutes.
Candidates (belonging to general and OBC category) should have secured minimum 65% marks in qualifying degree examinations. It is relaxed to 'pass class' for SC/ST/PH candidates.
Candidates currently in final year of their engineering studies may also apply. However, if selected, they must be in a position to submit their final mark sheet by 31st July 2011.

Age Limit

Maximum 26 years as on 30th June 2011 for the general category candidates. Age relaxation for OBC (Non Creamy Layer)/SC/ST/PH candidates will be applicable as per the Presidential Directive.

Selection, Training and Placement

The selection methodology will comprise of the following:

Graduate Aptitude Test in Engineers (GATE) 2011 score of the candidates in the concerned disciplines. The graduate engineers from the relevant disciplines, desirous of taking up a career with IndianOil are required to appear in GATE-2011
On the basis of GATE-2011 score, the candidates will be short listed for further selection process comprising of:
Group Discussion / Group Task
Personal Interview for assessment of different facets of knowledge, skill, attitude and aptitude.
Please note that only GATE-2011 score is valid for this recruitment exercise. GATE score of 2010 or prior to that is not valid.

Remuneration Package Engineers/ Officers

Candidates selected as engineers/officers will receive a provisional starting basic pay of Rs.24,900/-per month.

Graduate Apprentice Engineers (GAEs)

Candidates selected as GAEs for one-year apprenticeship training will be paid consolidated stipend @ Rs.20,000/- per month.

How to apply IOCL Recruitment 2010

GATE-2010 is scheduled on 13th February 2011. For detailed information on GATE-2011, interested candidates may log on to http://www.gate.iitm.ac.in or websites of other IITs and Indian Institute of Science (IISc), Bangalore.
Candidates need to purchase the GATE application form as per the information provided in GATE-2011 websites. They should fill-in and submit the GATE application form as instructed by the GATE authorities and wait for the admit card to get the GATE registration number
The candidates will receive their GATE-2011 registration number printed on their admit card. On receipt of GATE registration number, the candidates need to apply to IndianOil on-line. The relevant link will be made available from 10th January 2011 at the 'Careers' link of IndianOil website www.iocl.com.
Candidates should click on the on-line application link, read the instructions carefully and fill-in the on-line application form giving accurate information including the GATE-2011 registration number.
Upon completion, the candidate should submit the online application by clicking the Submit button at the bottom of the page. If the same is accepted, the system will generate a unique application ID along with the completed application form.
Candidate should take a print out of completed application, affix his/her recent passport size photograph, put his/ her signature at the space provided and keep with him/ her safely for future reference.
The passport size photograph affixed by the candidate should be the same submitted along with GATE-2011 application form. In case the candidate called for GD/GT and interview, he/she should come with this printed application form, along with GATE-2011 admit card and GATE-2011 official score card.
12th February 2011 is the last date for receiving application online.