Really Funny Jokes

>> Friday, December 24, 2010

Really Funny Jokes

Christmas jokes-Top 10 ways to confuse Santa Claus

Posted: 24 Dec 2010 12:02 AM PST


Top 10 Ways To Confuse Santa Claus on Christmas

10. Instead of milk and cookies leave Santa a Weight Watchers bar and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds!

9. While Santa's in the house... go find his sleigh and write him a speeding ticket!

8. While Santa's in the house... replace all his reindeer with exact replicas. Then wait and see what happens when he tries to fly!

7. Keep a bull in your living room. If you think a bull goes crazy when he sees a little red cape, wait until he sees that big fat Santa suit!!

6. Leave a note by the telephone telling Santa that Mrs. Claus called and wants to remind him to pick up a loaf of bread on his way home.

5. Take everything out of your house as if it has just been robbed. When Santa arrives, show up dressed like a policeman and say, "Well, well, well… They always return to the scene of the crime"

4. Leave out a copy of your Christmas list with last-minute corrections.

3. Leave out a Santa suit with a dry-cleaning bill.

2. Instead of Christmas ornaments decorate your tree with pumpkins!

1. Dress up like the Easter Bunny. Wait for Santa Claus to come and then say, "This neighborhood ain't big enough for the both of us buddy!!"

Animal jokes-Repellent

Posted: 24 Dec 2010 12:01 AM PST


A couple moved to the country side for their retirement living thinking they were going to live in midst of free animals.

One mild winter, they had a bit of a problem with rodents in the garage. So they bought one of those little sub-sonic mouse repellent from city, the kind you plug in and they emit some kind of ultrasonic sound that drives off mice.

The husband was showing it to their neighbor and explaining that it was an animal repellent. He told her that it worked on every thing from mice to elephants.

"Really!?" she said, "Mice to elephants, eh." sounding a bit skeptical.

"Yes," he replied, seriously. "We've had it here for a couple of weeks now and we haven't had a single elephant in the garage the whole time!"

Posted by madhu at 5:30 AM

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