Really Funny Jokes
>> Saturday, February 27, 2010
Really Funny Jokes |
- Adult jokes-Greek style
- Funny jokes-Severe vibration
- Humor jokes-The new bull
- Practical jokes-Blind pilot
| Posted: 27 Feb 2010 12:02 AM PST
A man goes into a little neighborhood pub, and when he sits down, he notices a beautiful woman sitting at the other end of the bar. He waves to her, and much to his surprise, she winks back at him. It doesn't take long before he is on the stool next to her. They talk for about fifteen minutes and then the man says to the woman, "You're really hot!" You're pretty cute, too," she says to him. "I'll tell you what. I live just around the corner. What do you think about coming up to my place?" It sounds great!" the man eagerly replies. "Before we go up there though", the woman says, "I have to ask you one question: Do you like doing it Greek style?" "Well...uh.. .I'm not exactly sure what that is, man answers, "but it sure sounds interesting and I'm willing to learn! Let's go!" So the two of them walk over to her apartment. As soon as they get inside the door, the woman rips off all her clothes. The man can't believe his eyes. The woman has an incredibly beautiful body. "Now, you're *sure*," the woman asks, "that you want to do it Greek style?" "Definitely! " the man replies. "All right, then," says the woman. "Take off all your clothes, and get up on the bed on yours hands and knees." "Sounds like fun!" the man exclaims. He leaps out of his clothes and climbs onto the bed on his hands and knees. The woman goes around and gets onto the bed right in front of the man. She kneels down in front of his head. She asks him again, "Are you sure that you want to do it Greek style?" "Yeah! Yeah!" says the man. The woman grabs the man with her arms right under his armpits, getting him in a lock hold. He can't move at all, and his head is pressing right into her chest. One more time she says, "Are you sure that you want to do it Greek style?" The man's muffled voice can barely be heard from between her breasts. "Yeah!" he mumbles, "Greek style!" The woman's grip on him tightens like a vice, and she yells out, "HEY GUS!"  |
| Posted: 27 Feb 2010 12:01 AM PST
According to "The Australian," an airliner recently encountered severe vibration in flight.The captain decided to make an emergency landing, and switched on the seat belt sign.The vibration stopped immediately.A passenger emerged from a lavatory and explained that he had been jogging in place inside.  |
| Posted: 27 Feb 2010 12:01 AM PST
At the end of the workday, one cowboy tells another, "That new bull nearly did me in today, partner." "Oh yeah, what happened?" "I was putting out the feed, when the sucker came charging at me like a locomotive from hell. He damn near got me!" "So, how'd you get away?" "Well the bull kept slipping. He slipped three times, and that gave me a chance to make it to the fence and jump over." "Man, that's scary. If it'd been me, I would probably have shit all over the place." "I DID! What do you think the bull was slipping on?"  |
| Posted: 26 Feb 2010 10:08 PM PST
One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner are seated waiting for the pilot to show up so they can get under way. The pilot and copilot finally appear in the rear of the plane and begin walking up to the cockpit through the center aisle. Both appear to be blind; the pilot is using a white cane, bumping into passengers right and left as he stumbles down the aisle. The copilot is using a guide dog. Both have their eyes covered with sunglasses. At first, the passengers do not react thinking that it must be some sort of practical joke. After a few minutes though, the engines start revving, and the airplane begins moving down the runway.The passengers look at each other with some uneasiness. They start whispering among themselves and look desperately to the stewardesses for reassurance.Yet, the plane starts accelerating rapidly, and people begin panicking. Some passengers are praying, and as the plane gets closer and closer to the end of the runway, the voices are becoming more and more hysterical.When the plane has less than twenty feet of runway left, there is a sudden change in the pitch of the shouts as everyone screams at once. At the very last moment, the plane lifts off and is airborne. Up in the cockpit, the copilot breathes a sigh of relief and tells the pilot: "You know, one of these days the passengers aren't going to scream, and we aren't going to know when to take off!"  |
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