Really Funny Jokes

>> Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Really Funny Jokes

Really funny jokes-Sam and John

Posted: 24 Feb 2010 12:02 AM PST


Sam and John were out cutting wood, and John cut his arm off. Sam wrapped the arm in a plastic bag and took it and John to a surgeon. The surgeon said, "You're in luck! I'm an expert at reattaching limbs! Come back in four hours." So Sam came back in four hours and the surgeon said, "I got done faster than I expected to. John is down at the local pub." Sam went to the pub and saw John throwing darts.
A few weeks later, Sam and John were out again, and John cut his leg off. Sam put the leg in a plastic bag and took it and John back to the surgeon. The surgeon said, "Legs are a little tougher - come back in six hours." Sam returned in six hours and the surgeon said, "I finished early - John's down at the soccer field." Sam went to the soccer field and there was John, kicking goals.
A few weeks later, John had a terrible accident and cut his head off. Sam put the head in a plastic bag and took it and the rest of John to the surgeon. The surgeon said, "Gee, heads are really tough. Come back in twelve hours." So Sam returned in twelve hours and the surgeon said, "I'm sorry, John died." Sam said, "I understand - heads are tough." The surgeon said, "Oh, no! The surgery went fine! John suffocated in that plastic bag!"

Halloween jokes-Top 10 Signs You Are Too Old to Be Trick or Treating

Posted: 24 Feb 2010 12:01 AM PST


10. You get winded from knocking on the door.
9. You have to have another kid chew the candy for you.
8. You ask for high fiber candy only.
7. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag, you lose your balance and fall over.
6. People say, "Great Keith Richards mask!" and you're not wearing a mask.
5. When the door opens you yell, "Trick or..." and can't remember the rest.
4. By the end of the night, you have a bag full of restraining orders.
3. You have to carefully choose a costume that won't dislodge your hairpiece.
2. You're the only Power Ranger in the neighborhood with a walker.
1. You avoid going to houses where your ex-wives live.

Yo mama jokes-Drawers

Posted: 23 Feb 2010 12:02 AM PST


Yo mama's so nasty, she only changes her drawers once every 10000 miles.

Adult jokes-Roping

Posted: 23 Feb 2010 12:01 AM PST


One day two rednecks decided to get married. After the wedding they left for their honeymoon. While driving down the road, the new bride sees two cows having sex.
The new bride asks, "What are they doing honey?" The husband answers, "They're roping!" She replies, "Oh, I see!"
After a few more hours of driving they pass two horses having sex. Again the bride asks, "What are they doing honey?" The husband answers, "They're roping!" She replies, "Oh, I see!"
Finally they arrive at their hotel. The couple washed up and started to get ready for bed. When they got in the bed, they started to explore each others body. The bride discovers her husbands penis.
"What is that?" she asks. "That's my rope," he answers.
She slides her hands down further and gasps, "What are those?" she asks "They're my knots," he answers.
Finally the couple begins to make love. After several minutes the bride says, "Stop honey, wait a minute! Her husband asks, "What's the matter honey, am I hurting you?"
"No," the bride replies, "undo those knots, I need more rope."

Posted by madhu at 5:19 AM

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