Posted: 17 Sep 2009 12:04 AM PDT

Ole is a farmer in Minnesota. He is in need of a new milk cow and hears about a nice one for sale over in Nordakota (that would be North Dakota for you non- Scandahoovians out there).
He drives to Nordakota, finds the farm and looks at the cow. He reaches under to see if she gives milk.
When he grabs the teat and pulls... the cow farts. Ole is very surprised. He looks at the farmer who is selling the cow, then reaches under the cow to try again.
He grabs another teat, pulls, and the cow farts again. Milk does come out however, so after
some discussion with the cow's current owner, Ole decides to buy the cow and take it home.
When he gets back to Minnesota , he calls over his neighbor, Sven, and says, 'Hey, Sven, come and look at dis ere new cow I yust bought. Pull her teat, and see vat happens.'
Sven reaches under, pulls the teat and the cow farts. Sven looks at Ole and says, 'You bought dis here cow in Nordakota, didn't yah?'
Ole is very surprised since he hadn't told Sven about his trip. Ole replies, 'Yah, dats right. But how did you know?'
Sven says, 'My wife is from Nordakota.'

Posted: 17 Sep 2009 12:03 AM PDT

Connie told her 4-year-old grandson, Dean, not to jump on the beds. After several warnings she punished him, explaining that should he fall, he would hurt himself badly.
Several minutes passed and he was back to jumping on the beds.
Connie said, "Dean, you weren't jumping on the beds again, were you?"
He stood with his little head dropped low and said, "I'm trying, but it's so hard to quit."

Adult jokes-Fetish

Posted: 17 Sep 2009 12:03 AM PDT

A young man is being pursued by a young admiring woman. Eventually,he has no choice but to grant her a private audience.
Relentlessly she asks him for a quickie in the sack though he tried hard to refuse her. Finally giving in to her demands for carnal knowledge, he says "Ok, but there is one condition: I have a particular fetish that you must perform in order to sleep with me."
"I'll do anything for you" replies the succubus. "Just name it."
So the man says to the woman, "You know ... I really enjoy it when there's a sort of lightning effect. So you must reach over to that switch on the wall and flick it on and off every few seconds."
The woman agrees and starts flicking the light switch off with her left arm. She then asks "Now can I f**k you?"
"Not quite yet" replies the man. "Lightning is nice, but it doesn't really mean much without thunder. So with your right leg, I want you to open and close the cabinet door whenever you flick the light on."
"Ok" says the horny young maid, and she begins to coordinate her flicks and clacks. "Now can I f**k you?" she asks as she is switching between arm and leg movements.
"Not quite yet" replies the man. "This is all very nice, but there can't really be thunder and lightning without wind. I'd like you to reach behind your head with your right hand and open and shut the windows."
She says "Ok" and begins opening the shutter and closing it with her right hand. And of course, it's raining and some drops are coming in the window.
So there she is, making lightning with her left hand, creating thunder with her right leg, and using her right hand to make wind and rain. Desperate and beyond understanding of his fetish, the young woman finally begs him "NOW can we f**k? PLEASE?!"
And the young man looks at her shocked and says, "What do you mean 'have sex'? In this weather?"

Really Funny Jokes

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Really Funny Jokes

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